Thursday, June 30, 2016

Long weekend time

Week one without Charro and all is well, just as I expected it to be.  I was insanely busy with work this week, so I'm glad I didn't have to be here to see Charro because I wouldn't have been able to do it.  She's back two weeks from today and I'm not missing paying her, that's for sure.

I haven't been on my computer much over the past few weeks.  It's too nice out and I've been busy with family and work and enjoying summer!!  

I need to kick my workouts of about 10 notches.  I really, really need to.  I started playing field hockey again, so maybe that will help a little, although I'm hesitant because I don't want to injure my head.

I've been weighing myself, not a ton, but I weighed myself this morning and yesterday.  It's totally fine.  Charro thought I was weighing myself every week, but I was not, mainly because I don't want to lie to her when she asks me how much I weigh.  So yes, my reason for not weighing myself is probably not the best, but at least it keeps me from lying about my weight.

I have no idea what the anchor is weighing on the news, but it's awful!  That's all I have to say.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Buon Viaggio

Charro leaves for Italy tomorrow so I won't see her again until July 14th.  I'm fine with that.  She told me that Kruger will be covering for her, in case I need anything.  She was joking (because she knows I'll never go see her), but not about her covering for Charro.  Ugh, Kruger!!!  She's the worst.

Charro said that I need to eat 800 calories for dinner because I didn't eat a lot today.  Phfa (that'st he sound I just made), like that's going to happen.  I didn't not eat a lot on purpose, and I actually would have eaten something before I saw her but I went from the train to her.  It's actually not an excuse, and I didn't realize how few calories I ate until she pointed it out to me.  Oh well, I'm not concerned.  I'm starving and making dinner right now.

Friday, June 17, 2016

Lady products

Charro and I were discussing my colonoscopy.  I was going on and on about how awful the stuff they make you drink is.  She didn't think it was that bad and couldn't understand how I thought that was the worst part of the whole procedure.  I was expecting a salty lemony flavored beverage, since that's what I had the last time, but much to my surprise, it was cherry salty flavored.  YUCK!!  I drank the whole first round but only got about 2/3 through the second.  Luckily I was all cleaned out so I didn't have to go back and drink the rest.  It's SOOO awful.  The after affects and the procedure itself are not big deal at all.  I think I heard my doctor say that I have to have another one in three years, but I was all drugged up so I'm hoping I misheard that.  I can't do it again.  They need a better way to clean us out.  Can't they put that crap in a pill form?!

Anyway, I was discussing this with Charro and she said how it could be so much worse, that I could have crohn's and have to have an NG tube or something.  Then she went on to say that her colleague has crohn's and is currently wearing "lady products."  Then she said, "Lady products.  That's what he calls them." I was A).  Not expecting her to say that it was a man, and B).  Can't believe she actually told me any of that.  Weird.

Charro leaves for Italy on Thursday so I'll be free for three weeks. :)  

I weighed myself before my colonoscopy, after a day of not eating and cleaning myself out.  I was fine with the number, Charro would have freaked out on me.  They didn't weigh me before the procedure and thought I weighed 5 pounds more than I did so I think I had more propofol than I needed.  I know the anesthesiologist gave me more, too, because I told him that I had woken up during my last one.  He said, "I'll make sure that doesn't happen."  It didn't.  I was out of it for a little bit after they woke me up.

My little kitties are stinking cute.  He's hysterical and she's a sweetie.  I took them to the vet the other day and she was shaking, she was so scared.  I was holding her and she was curled up in my arms shaking so much.  Poor baby.

I need to water my plants.

Sunday, June 12, 2016

FFJ destruction

I just destroyed two of my FFJs, which consisted of me ripping out the pages and soaking them in my sink with dish detergent so they'd get blurry and soft so I could smoosh them all together so they couldn't be read.  I think I have about 9 more left.  I was reading one of them, which I'm not ready to destroy.  I'm really not ready to destroy any of them but my fear is that something will happen to me and someone will find them and read them.  I'd be mortified (if I was alive to be mortified).  I'm also trying to get rid of stuff, since I'll be moving. It's not like 10 FFJs is going to make a big difference in a move, but I don't want anyone to find them.  

I have two more weeks of Charro before she leave for Italy for 3 weeks.  I'll spend a lot of time at home during that time, enjoying my pool and working.  I'm sure the kittens will be happy.  They love sitting in the window and watching the animals outside.

I weighed myself a bunch of times, a few weeks ago.  Last week Charro asked me when the last time I weighed myself was.  I told her.  She said, "So you're weighing yourself every week?"  I said, "No, I'm not.  I haven't weighed myself in while."  That was the truth.  She asked me what I weighed and I didn't really have to lie about it.  The first time I weighed myself I weighed what she wanted me to.  It changed after that, but I gave her the first number.  A bit deceptive, but whatever.

I have cat toys EVERYWHERE.  They have taken over my place, and I'm okay with that. :)  Both are asleep on my bed right now.  They're getting big.

Charro will be thrilled to learn that I destroyed two of my FFJs.

Tuesday, June 07, 2016

Ass chat

I'm a pro when it comes to colonoscopies...Not really, I've only had one, but I'm gearing up for my second.  Charro had one about 6 months ago and she asked me if she could start drinking the stuff on the train.  (She has about a 30 minute train ride, I think).  I said, "ON THE TRAIN!!!!  NOOOO, YOU CAN'T DRINK THAT ON THE TRAIN!!!"  She said, "Do I have to be close to home?"  I said, "CLOSE TO HOME??!!!  YOU HAVE TO BE CLOSE TO YOUR TOILET!!!!  Throw on some sweatpants and stay close to the bathroom."  Ha.  That still cracks me up.  She joked with me, yesterday, and asked if I was going to drink the stuff in her office.  The worst part of the whole process is literally drinking that stuff.  It tastes HORRIBLE!!  The thought of having something stuck up your ass is also not very lovely, but at least you're asleep for it.  I try not to think about it.

I heard on the news that propofol is the "truth drug."  Ugh, let's hope I don't decide to spill any secrets, like that fact that I've had an ED for 23 years.

Thursday, June 02, 2016

Green blob

I totally could have gone to see Charro this morning after she cancelled yesterday.  For some reason I thought she was going to be in her office with the scale, so I didn't suggest seeing her, and she thought I was going to be out of town.  So, we facetimed.  It was fine but I totally could have gone to see her. 
I told her that my stomach resembles this...

That is the green mucus blob from some commercial.  When I told her that my stomach looks like this she responded with , "I love that guy."  Well, I don't and I don't want my stomach to look like that.

I went for a run in the park last night, since I was going to run to my sesh but obviously didn't.  It was surprisingly a good run.  I just need to keep doing it so I get better at it.  It sucks that I used to be good at running and then I lost all of that when I had to stop doing it for a while because of my head.  I'm not getting any younger either, so that doesn't help.

I need to pack up my crap, I have a work thing to go to.

Wednesday, June 01, 2016


Last week I told Charro that we should watch and ED movie during my sesh that way I can explain to her, throughout the movie, what it is that I like about them.  She was surprisingly okay with that idea, if I thought it would be helpful.  It might be, but I don't know so I'm not going to waste my time sitting there watching a movie with her.

I'm looking forward to my sesh today.  I feel like I have stuff to talk about, which is always a good thing.  

This weather is freaking awesome!!!  I LOVE IT!!  That's all.  I freaking love summer more than anything, except for Christmas time.