Thursday, September 22, 2016

Stairmaster at the doctor

I like to write down my dreams on here so I remember them.  So here's another from last night.  Once again, Charro will love it.

I was at the doctor's office in the waiting room and it was packed with people.  They had chairs set up, like they normally do, but they also had cardio equipment.  So, I don't think I was there to see a doctor but was there to work out.  Bizarre, I know.  There were two anorexic girls sitting in the seats near the stairmaster I hopped on.  (I hate the stairmaster, by the way).  I think the mom of one was there too.  Anyway I saw that Charro was there too so I took off the watch to my heart rate monitor and hid it under a magazine or towel that I had on the machine.  A little of the pink band was sticking out and Charro saw it and came over and tried to grab it.  It fell and I jumped off and onto the ground and laid on it, holding it.  She tried to get it away from me but I wouldn't let go. 

I woke up and then had a continuation of the dream that went like this...

I was at my house, which was apparently a treatment center, at least my kitchen was, and there were others there.  We were outside on the deck eating our meal.  The big wig doctor where Charro works was there.  She was making sure we were eating and doing okay.  My first meal there was a breeze and I thought it would've been much harder.  There must have been an arcade around because I was collecting the gold tokens that you put into the machines.  I don't really remember what else was going on, but I remember Dr. A. being around and monitoring our food and stuff.

Saturday, September 17, 2016

Sitting on laps

I had a dream that I took one of my kitties to Charro with me, because I thought I was taking her home with me right after, but then I realized that I had time to go back to my place and get her before going home.  I got her there and we were about to start our sesh when this lady walked in.  I'm not sure if Charro was about to weigh me or make me eat, but the lady walked in to get something and I was like, "What the heck?!"

After that I ended up at a table with Charro and she was making me eat.  We sat down and there was a person in between us, so she made the guy move so she could sit next to me an monitor me.  I was mortified because there were a lot of people at the table and many of them I knew and I did not want them to see me being forced to eat by someone.  

I remember that I wasn't hungry and she was making me eat a lot.  I wasn't doing a good job of eating and I was so worried about my friends now knowing what was going on.  I wasn't eating so she picked me up, literally, and put me on her lap.  It was incredibly awkward...Incredibly!  I sat there very uncomfortably and didn't eat and she said, "You're 38 and sitting on my lap."  I said, "That's exactly what I was about to say and this is not normal."  I then got off because it was just weird.

I guess I woke up after that.

Monday, September 12, 2016

Heart Rate Monitor again

I ran to my sesh with Charro today.  She was like, "Why are you wearing that watch?"  I said, "What do you want me to wear, my nice silver one?"  She said, "Just don't wear one."  I said, "I can't leave the house without a watch, I feel naked."  That is 100% true.  Then she asked me if I was still wearing my heart rate monitor and I said yes.  She asked me if I had it on now and I said no, because I didn't.  She asked me if I wore it today and I said yes, I could've lied, and then she said "Give it to me."  I said no.  I should have handed it to her because it was all sweaty and she would've been so grossed out, but then I'd never get it back.  So then we had the HRM discussion and she wants me to give it to her on Thursday but I won't.  She wants a pros/cons list for it as well.  There really aren't any cons or pros, I just wear it.  So, I will make the list and not bring her my HRM on Thursday.  She won't be thrilled.

Wednesday, September 07, 2016

The new doc

I went for a physical today with my new doctor.  (My old one, whom I loved, moved).  Anyway, I wanted to pee in a cup before they weighed me, but that didn't happen.  Oh well.  The lady told me I was an inch taller than  I am and I got excited.  I made a comment on how I'm growing and then she corrected herself.  I told her that she ruined my day.

I went into the little room and waited for my new doctor.  I knew she was young because I googled her.  She walked in and she was shorter than I thought she was going to be and looked really young, but older too, which I know makes no sense, but it does to me.  I've never seen legs quite as white as hers either.  She didn't look like she looked in the picture I saw of her online.  

Anyway, she came in and she looked over my chart and went over my medical history.  She asked if there was any other health issues that she should know about.  I told her that I have "eating stuff."  Of course that's the most clear answer one can give someone.  Ha!  She obviously wanted to know what I meant, so I said, "restricting, but it's fine.  It's not really an issue."  She asked what I was doing for it and I said, "I see someone for it."  She asked how often.  She asked if this was an ongoing thing and I said, "Ya, over 20 years."  She said, "I'm glad you're getting help for it."  Um, okay!  Oh ya, how could I forget this.  She looked at my weight on the paper and she said she'd have to calculate my BMI (It's totally in the normal range) and then she said that I "look healthy."  I loved that one.  That subject ended and she asked if I work out and what I do for working out.  I told her I do and that I teach aerobics, play sports and work out.  She said that I probably walk a lot, being in NYC and I said that I do.  

Anyway, she was nice.  Had a flimsy handshake and was not as cool as my other doctor, but she'll do.  She said I could schedule my physical for next year, if I knew my schedule and wanted to.  Um, I'll wait, thanks.  I'll go see her again, but you can totally tell she's young and new.  Oh ya, and what the heck do they do at a physical anyway because not much was done?  I have to go for a my blood work next time I'm home, which won't be for a few weeks.

Friday, September 02, 2016

So full

Just got back with from my sesh with Charro.  I woke up really early and was hungry so I had some cereal.  I knew Charro was bringing me breakfast but I thought I'd still be hungry enough to eat it.  Well, I was kind of wrong there.  She brought me a huge bagel with lots of peanut butter.  I was so full by the time I got half way through it I thought I was going to die.  It took me the whole 50 minutes to eat it, which it would not have taken me if I was hungry.  Oh, let's not forget to mention the fact that peanut butter is not the easiest thing to swallow because it gets stuck in your mouth and throat so you have to continuously drink something.  Anyway, I wanted to throw because I was so full.  I actually didn't even give one thought to calories or fat or anything, I was just so disgustingly full.

I told Charro that I wasn't going to pass WIF.  She asked why and I told her that I lost a little weight.  She told me I was going to have to go back next week to have WIF again then.  Then she said, "Well, we'll see what it is and then we'll decide."  I got lucky, it was not bad at all.  I was 1 pound less than what she says I need to be.  Either my scale at home is wrong or that bagel weighed 50 pounds, which I think is more likely the case based on how my stomach feels right now.  She didn't make me stand backwards either.  I was prepared for the worst and it wasn't the case.  Eating the bagel completely sucked for no other reason than how full I was.

I have to make a dessert.  I'm having company tonight.

Thursday, September 01, 2016

Fessing up, here comes WIF

WIF tomorrow.  It's not going to go well at all.  At least Charro is bringing breakfast for us (or for me) tomorrow, I'm not really sure.  That will help push the scale up a bit.  I'm just going to fess up and tell her that I lost a bunch weight so maybe she won't be so hard on me.  I'm thinking that after I eat and drink some water, it won't be as bad as it is, but still not where she wants it to be.  I'm not really worried about it at this point.  I don't care.  

I'm not even trying to lose weight.  I'm eating things I would never eat, but I think I've just been stressed and I know that has something to do with it.  

Let's take guesses as to what Charro will bring me for breakfast.  I'm guessing it's going to be a muffin.  Let's be honest, a 700 calorie muffin is not the healthiest option in the world, and I'm not fond of the pointless calorie breakfast, which is why she'll probably bring it.  

I'm sure I'll have something to say tomorrow after my sesh.  I may be very pissed off if she refuses to see me after tomorrow.  We shall see.