Sunday, May 31, 2015

Fat stomach

I've been hating my fat stomach for a while now.  It used to be so nice and flat and now it's protruding out and I hate it.  Charro says I have to change my thoughts and accept how it looks and that it's "not fat."  Well, it's not at all how I want it to look.  I was coming back from a run today, well, I went and sat with a friend while she had breakfast after our run, and I could see my stomach sticking out in every window I passed.  I had to go to the bathroom, so that might have been the cause of some of it, but still, it was huge.  I can't take it.  I feel like I need to go work out again.

Of course Charro is not happy with my weight and says I need to gain weight and says, "Why do you always do this?  You go up and then you come back down again."  She didn't say it in those words, but that's sort of what she said.  I tried to tell her that I haven't lost any weight and that it was just my clothes that weighed more.  Oh, she pointed to where I need to be on the scale and I said, "If I took two sips of water I'd be there."  She was like, "That's not how it works, I'm the specialist."  I was thinking, "Ya, that's kind of how it works."  Oh well.  No WIF this Friday because I won't be going to my sesh.  

We're finally getting some much needed rain, and a little storm that has knocked out my satellite TV.  

Monday, May 25, 2015

Down the toilet

I've been given a weeks notice to gain weight.  Fun.  So that means I have 4 days.  Whatever.  I don't care and I'm not going to gain any weight.

So here's what happened on Saturday morning.  I think karma came and bit me in the ass.  I was getting ready to head to the gym.  I went to the bathroom, put the lid down and flushed the toilet.  I keep my heart rate monitor behind my toilet on a shelf and grabbed it.  Well, the little piece that straps onto strap fell and went through the tiny hole between the two screws that are there to lift the lid.  WHAT ARE THE CHANCES!!!??  I still can't believe it.  That was 100 dollars down the toilet...literally.  I can't tell Charro because then she'll question me about the HRM.  

I see Charro on Wednesday, no WIW, but there will be WIF.  It will be hot so I might have shorts on, which will cause an issue on the scale.  Oh well.

Friday, May 22, 2015

It's not me this time

Well, guess who got a concussion?  Nope, it wasn't me for was Charro.  She had a million questions for me, since I've had so many.  I confirmed that her symptoms were in fact similar to the ones I've had.  She went to a neurologist a few days after it happened, I however, fail to even see my GP.  

That was a lot of our sesh, then there was WIF.  Oh WIF.  I started to put my jacket on right before WIF and she vetoed that.  There went 3 pounds of my life on that scale.  I got on and got the lecture about how I needed to be 104.5 on her scale, even in summer clothes, and I was at least 3 pounds below that.  I told her, once again, that it was because I was wearing less clothes.  Oh ya, before I got on she was like, "What's in your pockets?  You have funny shaped things in there.  Are those weights?"  So I took out the one piece of hard candy and the chapstick that were in my pocket and said, "See, you don't need to pat me down."  So ya, she told me that I need to gain weight.  I don't really remember what she said, but whatever.  It is what it is.  I said, "I honestly have not lost any weight."  She didn't care because she said I need to be higher.  I don't want to be higher and I probably won't be higher, so then we'll go through the whole "I can't work with you if your not this many pounds."  Grr,  Annoying.  Bed time.

Monday, May 18, 2015

Back in high school

I just came to the realization the my scale must have been wrong in high school.  There was one point in time when I weighed 92 pounds, according to my scale.  Maybe it was in the Winter or Spring because I always got my physicals for school in August.  If I had weighed that in August, I'm sure my doctor would have said something, but she didn't.  That leads me to believe that my scale was wrong or that I wasn't that weight when I went to the doctor.  Not sure why I thought of that today, but I did.

I wonder what will happen on WIF.  Hmm, it's 4 days away so we'll see what happens.  I don't think my eating has been that great.  I had dinner, I'm still hungry, which I guess is a good thing, but I can't think of anything that I want to eat.  I have cherries and pineapple in the fridge and I don't want those.  I'm not really in the mood for anything and when that happens, I just don't eat.  I'm sure I'll have some sort of snack in a bit.

I was sitting in Starbucks waiting for Charro this morning, because she was late.  I was hanging out when I saw her walk by, so I figured it was time to go.  I snuck (I refuse to say sneaked) up behind her on the street and we walked in.  My sesh was uneventful.  I really need to start talking about something.  I'll try and make a list for Friday.

I made an appointment for my physical today.  I don't go until the end of July.  I am very curious to know if she'll ask me about my ED.  Charro says that she will, if she's a good doctor.  We shall see.  All I know is that I'm going to want to weigh less when I go.

Friday, May 15, 2015

Almost caught in the act

I take off my Fitbit when I go into Charro's office because if she saw me wearing it, she would confiscate it.  I'll know if she reads my blog if she questions me on this, but I'm pretty sure she won't.  Anyway, I left her office on Monday and was waiting for the elevator.  I put my Fitbit back on and as soon as I got it on she walked out the door and was waiting for the elevator with me.  I moved my bag to block my right wrist.  I'm sure I looked suspicious and like I was totally caught doing something I shouldn't have been, when she walked out the door.  We chatted on the way down and then that was it.  

Today was WIF.  I don't know why, but I stood on the scale for 9 hours.  She said that I lost .6 of a pound.  Really?  I told her that I lost clothes.  She's not buying that one, but it's true.  Although, last week I did not have my wallet in my pocket and today I did.  Hmm.  I forgot what she said but I'm pretty sure it was something about me having to be up by next week.  We'll see about that.

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Whole milk

On Monday Charro was talking about how she's going to get me some drink from Starbucks with whole milk in it.  She was saying that she can't pick it up because she has people before me so I asked her if she wanted me to pick it up.  Her response was, "No, I don't trust you."  Then I interrupted her and said, "I wouldn't trust me either."  There was more to it but I don't remember.  I do NOT want to drink something with whole milk, that's for sure, so hopefully this will never happen.  It's supposed to happen next Friday but I'm hoping something comes up and she can't get it.

I was supposed to make brownies and eat them.  Charro wanted me to do that because I told her that I was going to make brownies for mother's day but didn't want to because I didn't want to eat them.  She said I needed to make them and eat some.  She doesn't want me slipping into some slippery slope.

WIF should be interesting tomorrow.  I didn't lose weight, but I don't know if I'll weigh what she wants me too.  I'm not sure how chilly it will be in the morning so I'm not sure if I'll have on pants or shorts.  I'm guessing I'll have jeans on, which will be good.

I need to go to bed.

Saturday, May 09, 2015

Surprise Juice

Charro was supposed to bring some sort of mocha something drink from Starbucks yesterday, but wasn't able to do it because she had people before me.  She emailed me and told me that I could pick up a drink of my choice or we could do the challenge on Monday.  Well, I didn't have time to pick up a drink, not that I was planning on doing so anyway, but when I got there she had a surprise apple juice.  I had to drink that thing, which I don't think was so great for my colitis.  Oh well.  She said the next drink will be the mocha whatever with WHOLE milk.  I said, "There's no need for that!  No need for whole milk."  She disagreed, of course.

Onto WIF...she said exactly what I knew she would.  I was "down" 1.5 lbs yesterday because of my clothing and and she said, "You lost weight."  I said, "No, I lost clothes."  I'm fully aware of my clothes and what's in them and that they add a lot of weight.  The shiites really going to hit the fan when I'm wearing shorts and a tank top.  Oh well.

Thursday, May 07, 2015

Will there be a beverage?

Charro's bringing in drinks tomorrow, or so she says for the 50th time.  Surely she won't forget for the third time in a row, I can't be that lucky.

WIF should be interesting since I'll be wearing much fewer clothes than last week.  She'll tell me that I've lost weight and I'll say that I've lost clothes and she'll disagree and that's how it will go.

I cannot wait until the weekend is here.  Let this week be over!!

In other news...THE WEATHER IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, May 01, 2015

105.5 WIF

Nope, those aren't the call numbers and letters for a radio station, that's what I was on Charro's scale today.  Let's rewind a little, shall we?  Charro says I can't go below 103, but on her scale that means I have to be higher than 103 because she subtracts for my clothes.  Today is the first day that she let me see my weight and this was her new reasoning behind it.  She said that "being weighed blind is for people who don't weigh themselves, and let's face it, you weigh yourself all the time, so you may as well see your weight."  Okay.  She wants me to stop weighing myself but we all know that that won't really happen.  She said, "You need to stop weighing yourself yourself."  We then looked at each other and sort of laughed because she said "yourself" twice.  Anyway, she weighed me and I weighed 105.5 on her scale, which was clearly very traumatic for me to see that number, even though I know that is not what I weigh at all.  I had on jeans, a belt, keys in my pants, t-shirt, sweater, and a sort of heavy jacket with my wallet and phone in it, plus I had eaten and had lots of water.  So, I know that wasn't my real weight, not even close, but it still sucks to see that number.  I weighed myself at home and I was almost 7 lbs less than that, so unless my scale is totally off, my clothes weighed a lot.  Charro wants me to weigh more too, which is so not going to happen.

I was interrupted so many times while I was trying to write this that it might not flow or many any sense, but I've never been one for proof reading so what you see is what you get.

Oh ya, she forgot to get the caloric drink.  I was clearly so upset and disappointed by that. NOT.  She said she's going to bring one on Monday.  Awesome.  Can't wait.  Looking forward to it.