Monday, May 19, 2014

Looking away

The post sesh wrap-up begins now.

I've realized that when I'm really uncomfortable talking about things I tend to not look at Charro and look everywhere but at her.  I'm sure she's picked up on this as well.  We were talking about how I told everyone my weight and what that meant.  That's not what made me uncomfortable, I guess it was more of the why I want to be small thing, which I'm still not really sure about.  Sometimes I feel like she's looking for an answer so I just give her what she would say to me.  Not the best way out of things, and it's not something I do all of the time.  I didn't do that this time.

She forgot about the bagel that I'm supposed to have and has not changed it to a 3 egg omelette, full eggs, not just whites.  I'm not doing that.  I'd rather eat 10 whites than have the yolks.  Eggs, in general, freak me out...and it has nothing to do with nutrition, it's about the looks of them and the grossness of them.  They gross me out.  I eat them for protein and that's about it.  They're a gross consistency and yucky.  

I stood up to leave and realized I looked enormous.  I said, "Just so you know, I look totally huge right now.  Goodbye."  Then she chimed in and wanted me to challenge those thoughts before I left.  That didn't happen.  
I hate when I feel huge, especially after just running, which I had just done.  Yuck.

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