Wednesday, June 07, 2017

I just like...

So here's another classic Charro classic.  I thought she was going to call someone a douche bag, but instead she said dufus.  (Not sure how you spell that).  So I said, "I thought you were going to same something else."  She goes, "Douche bag?  I thought you thought I was going to say that.  I don't use that word.  I just like douches so I don't know why that's an insult.  I'M KIDDING!!  That's 90's, have you ever heard of a douche since the 80's?"  Oh dear, Charro.  Then she goes, "The word means shower in French, so that makes it even funnier."  I'm not sure how it makes it funnier, but who knows.

So I'm going to the office with the scale on Friday morning.  UGH!  I have not been there in 100 years and I hope to freaking God she doesn't weigh me.  She didn't mention having WIF, but that doesn't mean anything.  She may just surprise me, and it won't be a good surprise.  Maybe she just gave up and won't do it.  Lord help us.  She may or may not bring a breakfast challenge too, but I don't know.  I told her that she has to let me know!

Thursday, May 04, 2017

PT and ED

Charro thinks I should tell my physical therapist that I have an eating disorder.  Um, no.  That's not going to happen.  She thinks she should know.  I told her it's not going to change how she treats my injury.  Like I'm just going to slip that in there while she's got my body all twisted up in some crazy stretch..."Oh, by the way, I've had an eating disorder for 24 years."  Nope, not happening.  Charro wanted to know why I wouldn't tell her and I said "because it's embarrassing."  She wanted to know why I thought that.  I told her it was because it's something I can control and I don't want people to know about it.  It's not like some medical condition that I was diagnosed with that I have no control over.  Bottom line is that she doesn't need to know.  If she figures it out on her own, which she won't, and asks me, then I'll tell her, but until then, mum's the word.  She touches my body and grabs my ribs and hips every time I see her, so she knows what my body is like.  She grabbed my love handles one time and I wanted to die.   I did make a comment about my stomach once, about it being fat, and she was like "Ya right."  I'm sure she's figured out that I'm a little obsessive about working out, but I can't be 100 percent sure about that.

I love PT.  I feel so good when I leave.  I learn a lot too.  I wish I could keep going.  I was feeling great and then I had a little set back and now the pain is back.  I'm not in a ton of pain, which is good, but it's pretty constant if I'm sitting or walking.  Laying down seems to be okay.

So that's that.  I'm trying to figure out my life next week.  It might be a crazy week with lots of travel, but I'll know more tomorrow.  There are a lot of factors coming into play.

Friday, April 07, 2017

10 Years!

Yesterday marked 10 years with Charro.  I remember my first appointment.  I was scared to death.  My friend, who worked with Charro at the day treatment center, brought me.  I remember what I was wearing.  I remember what Charro was wearing.  I've come a long way since that day.

I wrote a poem recapping our 10 years.  It didn't have everything in it, or I'd still be writing it.  Oh, we were also in a new office yesterday, which is right next to the other office, in the same suite.  In the poem I made reference to her typing her hair in a knot and then said "will you ever settle down in one spot."  Well, she took that as me being pissed at her for changing offices all of the time and went onto say that we were in the other office for 7 years.  I was like, "Woah, I'm fine with this office."  Chill out sister.  (I've seen in her in 8 different offices, by the way).  I had also, jokingly, called her a "disaster" after she spilled something.  That didn't go over well either.  Dude, I've known you for 10 years and you can't tell when I'm kidding yet?  Those were the two examples that she gave me when I asked why she thought I was pissed at her.  I was like, "Seriously?!"  I don't know what the hell that was about, but it was bizarre.  I told her that she shouldn't read into everything so much.  Weird. I wrote her an email while I was on my way home saying how I don't know why she thought I was pissed at her, but I wasn't, and if I was I would tell her.

I have a hang nail that's driving me insane right now.  

I got cleared to run 1 mile last week.  Of course I ran two, twice and I think that didn't bother me at all, but when I decided to run faster than I should have, I think that did the damage.  I went to PT and for the first time, got a massage.  My PT didn't even want me to do any exercises.  When I walked in and she asked how I was I said, "In more pain than I was last time I saw you."  She said, "What did you do?"  Hmm.  My favorite was when she grabbed a bit above my love handles and was sort of shaking them and asking me if I felt that.  Well, I couldn't feel anything because I was so horrified by the fact that she had her hands on me there.  I wanted to die.  I refrained from saying anything about my fat and just let her try and fix my back.  So, I'm off the running, and doing just about everything but the elliptical.  UGH!!!  I can't stand it.  The worst part about the whole thing is that I'm not in a lot of pain at all, so I want to do things and feel like I can.  GRRR.

I have to go cut this hang nail now.

Monday, April 03, 2017

It's been a while

I haven't written in a while, so I figured I pop in and write something.  Let's see...I went on a vacation a few times.  Charro stopped weighing me. :).  I have an injury that's preventing me from doing a lot of the exercises that I do, which is driving me insane.  My PT just cleared me to run 1 mile, probably because he got sick of hearing me ask when I can run.  Anyway, so I ran 2 miles twice this weekend, before switching over to the elliptical.  Charro is changing offices again, but luckily for me, she's just moving offices in her suite.  That happens this week.  Speaking of this week, Thursday marks 10 years of me seeing Charro.  WHAT!!!??  That's insane.  Like, completely insane.  I'll probably have something to say about that later.

I've been traveling a lot, work and pleasure.  Doing it again today.  That's about it.  Nothing exciting here.

Monday, February 13, 2017

Where do we go from here?

Alright, so Charro suggested that we stop working on my ED.  She weighed me today and I had lost weight.  She said, "You clearly don't want to gain the weight so what are we doing here?  Maybe we should just stop talking about the ED and work on other things.  This is like malpractice on my part."  She then went on to say something about still being able to work with me because my weight is not below 90%, and as long as my labs keep coming back normal, she can continue to see me.  She said that's the she'll weigh me occasionally just to make sure that I don't drop below.  I was 3.5 pounds less than she wanted me to be, and then she said, that I was probably a pound less than that because of my clothes, but said that I can stay there if that's where I want to be.  So, we'll see what happens.

I wrote her a pretty extensive email with all of my thoughts.  I told her that she didn't have to read it because I would read it to her on Thursday, but if she wanted to read it and respond with some questions for me, I could have the answers for her when I see her on Thursday.  I'm guessing that she'll choose to just have me read it to her on Thursday.

So, that was my morning, in a nut shell.  We shall see what she says on Thursday.

Friday, February 10, 2017

The email resolved

It went from 62 degrees one day, to a 9 inch snow storm the next.  I came back from 83 degrees and now it's 29.  Yuck.  

I asked Charro about the email and she said that she never got it, which I knew was not the case because you can tell when someone with AOL reads your mail.  Then she did remember getting it and reading it but completely missed the part where I asked her if we could do a phone sesh.  I'm glad I asked because I knew she wouldn't have just blown me off.  She felt really bad about it, especially since she said she has tons of time on Tuesdays.  Oh well. 

She warned me that she's going to weigh me on Monday.  I'm glad she gives me a heads up.  I wish she'd just stop weighing me.  I said, "You forgot to weigh me last week."  She said that she's "spacing it out."  Um, okay. 

That's all.

Tuesday, January 31, 2017

A bit annoyed

I emailed Charro yesterday morning and she never got back to me.  I know she's read the email, but she didn't respond, which is weird because I asked her a question.  She's usually good at responding, so maybe she thinks she sent me an email back or she had some big emergency or something.  I just think it's really weird that she didn't get back to, and like I said, I'm a bit annoyed by that.  I really don't think she'll get back to me at this point.  It would have taken her two seconds to respond so maybe she thinks she did.  Who the heck knows.

In other news, work put me on the wrong insurance plan and I thought they were going to be able to put me on the one that I asked for, but now the insurance company is telling them no.  I am going to be beyond pissed if that is the case because I will end up paying a crap load more money than I need to be paying.  I've already met my deductible so I'd be good to go with everything, on the plan I was supposed to have.  I will lose it if they can't fix this.  We've been working on it for 2 weeks now.